


Just To Feel

by alex4968



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Cowboy Harry, Kitten Louis, Laughter During Sex, M/M, Party, Slight feminization
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-28
Updated: 2017-09-28
Packaged: 2019-01-06 15:45:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12213906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alex4968/pseuds/alex4968
Summary: Reason #17: Your car's already at their place and you're too lazy to move it.When he wakes up, his back hurts, his head is pounding, and his mouth is extremely dry. There’s too much light around him and he doesn’t remember falling asleep at all the night before, let alone getting home. But as soon as he opens his eyes, he realizes very quickly that he’s not home.He’s managed to fall asleep on the floor of Harry Style’s flat.





	Just To Feel

**Author's Note:**

> My friend Jordan officially turned me to the dark side of cowboy Harry, but I'm not ready to fully commit so it's just cowboy harry in a costume. 
> 
> Title from "Setting Fires" by the Chainsmokers.

Parties have always been Louis’ scene.

Something about the too loud music and the too big crowds of people have always left Louis feeling overwhelmed and eager to have fun in the absolute best of ways. He loves being surrounded by bodies all moving to the same beat of music and he loves the free alcohol even more. His body always feels a little more electric when he’s in a crowd, dancing, grinding up on someone – it’s just the exact kind of scene that he thrives in.

But as he sits at his own kitchen table, his phone in his hand, he doesn’t know how to feel. He’d woken up to a text from an unknown number and hadn’t thought anything of it until he read it.

“ _Hiii! This is Harry Styles from ur Eng. Lit class? I got your number from Niall and I was just wondering if you want 2 come to my party this week?”_

He’s heard of Harry’s parties before – knowing that they’ve always been notorious for being the best parties on this side of London – but being invited to one was an entirely different story. He’d never actually heard of someone getting directly invited to one of his parties, since they’ve always been known to be exclusive, and now his stomach is in knots and he has absolutely no clue what to feel.

Harry Styles had invited him to one of his parties – one of his _Halloween_ parties nonetheless.

Louis normally wouldn’t be this stressed about going to a party – he’s actually _never_ been this stressed about going to a party – but Harry Styles is by far the most attractive man he’s ever seen in his life and he’s asked him to come to his house dressed up.

That alone is enough to make it stressful.

Halloween is in four days, meaning he has exactly three and a half to find a proper costume for himself to look, hopefully, sexy enough for Harry to notice him, but not so much that he looks like a slut. He groans, then throws himself back on the couch, throwing an arm over his face dramatically.

“What’s wrong, mate?” Niall asks, walking in from the kitchen with a bowl of crisps in his hand.

“Oh nothing, my entire life is just coming to a premature end. You know. No biggie.”

“Still just as much of a drama queen as always. What happened?”

“Harry Styles invited me to his Halloween party!”

“And?”

“And he’s literally the most attractive man I’ve ever seen in my entire life and I have to find an attractive costume and I have to not make a fool of myself and he invited _me!”_ He sighs again, staring up at the roof of their flat. “I can’t go. I just can’t go. There’s no way. I can’t.”

“Lou. You’re going. And you’re going to have a great time and all of this worrying is going to seem stupid when you’re done.” He throws a pillow at Niall in retaliation, but he knows just as well as his friend that he’s going to end up going. He’s heard enough rumors that you don’t get invited to a second party if you don’t show up to the first. Wasting the opportunity just isn’t something he can see himself doing.

 

Four days later, Louis finds himself on the road towards the more posh side of London. It’s nerve wracking in a way he can’t even comprehend, and he almost has to pull over for a moment just to compose himself. Niall is right in front of him, though, his bright yellow honda civic clear as day, and that’s the only way he will know where to go.

Parking is much less of a mess than he’d thought it would be, and the two of them find a place easy before making the trek to the inside of the building.

The ride up the lift to the eighth floor leaves his heart pounding and his palms sweaty, but with one more once over in the selfie camera of his phone, he knows he looks great and has nothing to worry about. His ears are positioned perfectly on his head, bobby pinned to blend into the wisps of hair that are combed into a little quiff.

He has just the slightest amount of brown eyeshadow around his eyes with a very light shade of pink lip gloss over his lips, just to make his costume really pop.

A thin leather collar is wrapped around his neck with a little silver L hanging from where the clip would be, snug against his skin just inches above the collar of his shirt. He knows it leaves little to the imagination – the pale of his skin showing through the near transparent material of his shirt.

Tight, black jeans hug the curves of his body just right, exactly how he’d intended, and his outfit is completed by the fully black vans on his feet. The entire outfit had only come together by accident – several bits and pieces of previous costumes and pieces out of his wardrobe all came together to create something he felt perfectly confident and sexy in all the same.

It’s barely five minutes before he’s walking through the door of Harry’s flat. The first thing he notices is that there’s barely anyone there yet. The second thing he notices is exactly how beautiful Harry’s flat really is. Three floor to ceiling windows are open in the back of the flat, showing the expanse of the city beyond them. Strings of fairy lights are hung from the railing outside of the flat, and on the framing of the windows, too, shining a bright white. Plastic pumpkins, painted various patterns of gold and black, adorn book shelves and side tables all throughout the flat, along with stark black flowers in red vases places amongst them.

The sun is already entirely below the horizon, stars shining brightly beyond the windows, and he turns to Niall in confusion. “Niall!” He hears from down the hallway before he sees Harry walk through. He’d expected the party to already be going, having never showed up to a party early before, so he just tries to push down the awkward feeling.

“Hey, mate. This is Louis. Louis, Harry.” He’s known for years that Niall and Harry have been close, but he never knew they were _this_ close.

“Hi, Louis.” Harry talks so slow, and his voice is so deep and so perfect – Louis already feels like he needs a drink. He’s got a tight blue shirt on, hugging his body perfectly. The lining of the shirt itself is red, adding a gentle but important pop of color to the entire outfit. Long, loose pants hang down his legs, a gaudy leather belt attached at his waist with a fake pistol in a little holster. His collar is snapped back, ironed crisp and it all ties in perfectly with the large, brown cowboy hat on the top of his head.

Louis has to force himself to look away.

There’s a knock at the door, then, and Harry saunters over and goes to let whoever it is in, while Niall starts to fiddle with the music system.

As soon as a few more people are through the door, the atmosphere starts to feel more familiar, more comfortable. Everything starts to fall into place, and _finally_ he gets Harry out of his head. Mostly.

He drinks and dances and has as good of a time as he would at any other party. He’s lost count of how many shots he’s taken when he finally finds Niall again at some time during the night, his words already slurring together. “Niall – Have you seen Harry’s costume?” He whisper yells over the music. Harry is in the kitchen, barely fifteen feet away from them, and he’s still just as gorgeous as he was when the night started.

Louis is almost entirely sure that he’s started to look a bit less put together with all the dancing he’s been doing through most of the night, but he’s stopped caring.

“Yes, mate, I’ve seen his costume.” Niall says with a laugh.

“I want to suck his cock.” He says, leaning on Niall, just a little too much for support. He’s either lucky Niall hasn’t been drinking as much as him or that he can hold his liquor, because he’s nearly falling over at this point. “He’s so pretty, Niall. I want – I want,” He laughs at his own joke before he’s even said it, but there’s a smile on Niall’s face still. “I want to ride him.” He’s nearly crying laughing by that point.

“Wouldn’t he be riding you, since he’s the cowboy?” Niall asks, and that only makes Louis laugh harder.

“Niall, anything involving Styles’ cock would be just fine with me.”

 

 

When he wakes up, his back hurts, his head is pounding, and his mouth is extremely dry. There’s too much light around him and he doesn’t remember falling asleep at all the night before, let alone getting home. But as soon as he opens his eyes, he realizes very quickly that he’s not home.

He’s asleep on the floor of Harry Style’s flat.

The previous night is a little blurry, but he remembers bits and pieces of it very clearly. The most embarrassing thing he can remember himself doing is telling Niall exactly how much he was attracted to Harry – and that’s dangerous information. He trusts Niall, he really does, but there’s something scary about that information being anywhere except inside his head where it belongs. Especially in the way he put it. That’s something only Drunk Louis would ever say out loud, and he hopes more than anything that Niall won’t expose the things he says when he’s drunk.

There’s a mess of various Halloween decorations, cups, used paper plates, and napkins strewn about the floor all around him. Harry’s flat had gone from pristine the night previous, to completely trashed the next day. He actually feels a little pang of guilt when he realizes, though, that he’s the only one who’d passed out on the floor.

He sits up, ignoring the sudden jolt of pain that shoots to his head with the movement, and hears that there are two voices coming from somewhere else in the flat. He can definitely feel that he’s still too drunk to drive, but beyond that he’s entirely too lazy to go all the way out there and go to his car, anyway.

“I’ll go wake Lou up and tell ‘im to leave.” He hears Niall say, his voice always having been naturally loud enough to carry through a room. He doesn’t hear exactly what Harry says in response, but he almost thinks he’s glad he doesn’t. “Oh, hey Lou!” Niall says as soon as he sees him sitting up.

“Hey.” He replies, moving to stand up. He’s still lightheaded and still definitely drunk, so he wobbles a bit as he stands. Niall grabs him for support, keeping him from falling over, and he’s grateful for that.

“Want me to take you home? You’re definitely in no place to be driving right now.”

“You can stay if you want, have some tea and sober up a bit.” Harry says, finally emerging from the kitchen. He doesn’t have his costume on anymore, replaced just by a plain white tee shirt and some loose sweats.

“Uh, yeah. Sure. I really appreciate it.” Harry gives Louis a look that he really can’t describe – with the corner of his mouth just barely turned up, not enough to be a smirk and not little enough to be smug.

“I always stay after to help Harry clean up. You don’t have to help if you don’t want to.”

“You act like I’m that rude, Niall. Of course I’ll help. It looks like this is more than a two-person job anyway.” He looks around the entire flat and it’s almost mind blowing. He hadn’t even realized a flat could _get_ this trashed.

“Oh, this isn’t even that bad. The Christmas party… a few guys who weren’t invited showed up and _really_ trashed the place. Now we have to look out for them.”

“I didn’t realize you and Harry were that close.” He says, making Niall laugh.

“Harry and I have been mates since A-Levels. I thought I’d told you that before.” Louis just shrugs. Niall hands him a large, black trashbag and Harry hands him a cup of tea. He sips at his drink as he helps the other two clean up the incredible mess around them.

 

It takes three hours and several cups of tea, but when they’re finally finished, Louis is exhausted. He’d filled two full trashbags, scrubbed stained hardwood, helped put leftovers into containers, and condensed half empty containers into one. It doesn’t seem like as much as it felt like when he lists it in his head, but his body aches in places it hasn’t since he played footie on a real team.

“Wow, you two are real life savers.” Harry says as the three of them sit on the sofa. “How about some breakfast?” Harry offers, looking over to the two of them.

“I could eat something.” Louis says at the same time Niall says, “Fuck yes, you better make your muffins.” It gives the truth to the sad reality that Louis is still a complete stranger to Harry – other than the few times they’d walked by each other and made eye contact in class.

Harry goes and starts cooking something in the kitchen, and after a few moments Niall follows him. Louis sits on the couch for a while, half-way watching the telly and half staring out the window. He’s pretty sure he’s all the way sober now, and he’s probabaly long since overstayed his welcome. He _should_ just leave – just walk right out the door and get in his car and drive away.

But the thought of getting car up and walking all the way down the hall and then all the way out into the parking lot where his is seems like an awful lot of work at that moment. He ends up nodding off on the couch this time, still sitting up.                                                 

 

He startles awake a little while later and the flat is almost dark. He can see through the window that the sky is illuminated in different shades of pink, telling that it’s sundown now. A slight panic starts to build in his stomach as he looks around the flat and doesn’t see Niall or Harry. He can hear the shower running and he knows that’s the perfect time for him to escape without embarrassment ruining his entire life.

If he hadn’t overstayed his welcome before, he knows he certainly has now, so the only way he can ever show his face again is if he gets out without Harry knowing.

Quietly, he walks over to the kitchen where he knows he’d left his car keys and searches through the little bowl of keys for his own set. He looks three or four times before he dumps the entire small bowl out.

His keys are definitely not there and he has no clue what to do.

Putting all of the keys back in the bowl quickly, he decides it would be best to just take the tube home and figure out what the fuck he’s supposed to do later. Nothing like this has ever happened before – at least not in the sense where he’s cared enough about what the host thought about him to think twice about it.

But as soon as he’s halfway through the living room, Harry walks out of the bathroom, only a towel around his waist, and the two of them freeze and just look at each other for a moment. Louis has never wanted to stop existing more than in that moment. “Hey,” Harry says, like it’s not totally weird that Louis is standing in his living room nearly eighteen hours after the party ended. “I didn’t know you were still here. Figured you’d left with Niall.”

“Oh um, I accidentally passed out on the couch. Niall didn’t wake me up.” He says before he clears his throat. “I was just leaving, actually. I’ve overstayed my welcome.” He says, the heat in his face only getting worse.

“Hey, no, wait. I actually wanted to ask you something anyway, so I’m glad you’re still here. Let me just go toss some clothes on first.” Louis has no clue what to do, so he just nods. Harry seems so at ease, like he isn’t worried about anything in the world, and it’s only making Louis feel even worse.

Harry comes out just a few minutes later, and he looks better than Louis thinks he ever has. It’s not fair, really. He has a tight black shirt on with joggers on his legs, followed with white tube socks that he never thought would look good on anyone, yet Harry makes them work.

“You wanted to ask me something?” Louis asks right off the bat, just hoping that it’ll be an easy answer and then he can leave.

“Oh, yeah.” Harry says easily, “So like… last night. I think I heard you say something to Niall. And normally I wouldn’t care but like, I do. Did you tell Niall you want to have sex with me?” He doesn’t even sound awkward asking Louis if he’d literally overheard his biggest crush. And that’s it. This is exactly how Louis’ world is going to end. Right here, right now, he’s entirely certain embarrassment is going to swallow him whole and dissolve him right into the ground beneath his feet.

“Oh my god.” Is all Louis says first. He’s pretty sure his heart isn’t even beating.

“I’m just curious.”

“Oh, my God.” Louis repeats, his face suddenly heating up more than it ever has. Harry had _heard_ him, talking about wanting to _suck him off._ The desire to run away and go off-grid and never resurface in society ever again is stronger than it ever has been. “Oh, god, I’m so embarrassed. I just – you really are just so pretty and – oh my _god_ I need to stop - but like, you weren’t supposed to hear that and I’m sorry you did and –“

“Louis.” Harry says softly.

“This is so humiliating I’m like – so sorry – I say things when I’m drunk that –“

“Louis.” The other man repeats a little more firmly, making Louis actually shut up and look at him. “I’m going to kiss you now, if that’s all right.” Well. Louis really can’t say no to that, so he lets Harry kiss him – lets him lean in and close the already small space between them. As their lips press together, Louis’ head almost feels a little fuzzy. This isn’t the type of thing that happens in real life – and if it is, it’s not the type of thing that happens to him.

He doesn’t get lucky enough to kiss pretty boys that he’s had a crush on for years and he certainly doesn’t get lucky enough for those pretty boys to hold him the way Harry’s holding him now, close and tight.

Except, it appears that he does.

Harry’s arms are holding him tightly, like he’s scared Louis is going to float away. Louis puts his hands on Harry’s shoulders, melting into the closeness between them. They don’t hold back, hands roaming beneath clothing, touching any bits of exposed skin they can, and he feels like everything is clicking into place.

“Do you know how long I’ve wanted this, Louis?” Harry asks when he pulls away. “How many times I’ve wanted to invite you over when there wasn’t a party, when it could just be us. But I was so certain you’d laugh me away.” Louis has no clue what to think about that, what to say, what to feel. “You would always look away as soon as I looked at you, every time in class. And it was – it just made me sure you didn’t care.”

“I never even – I didn’t even notice. It wasn’t on purpose.” He says, his face warm again. “I’d like you to touch me, Harry.” He says before he kisses Harry again. It seems to take the other man by surprise for just a moment, his mouth slack and pliant, before he’s holding Louis’ hips tightly, lifting the smaller boy up and carrying him towards the bedroom.

Harry lays him out on the bed, climbing up to straddle him, and everything still feels _right._ Their hips are touching now, clothed cocks so close, and Louis is _desperate._ He hasn’t been so desperate to get a boy in bed in – he doesn’t think he’s ever been so desperate to get a boy in bed. But Harry is just something entirely different. When Harry touches him, cups him through his pants, it feels like everything’s come to a halt.

He moans into his mouth when Harry leans down to kiss him once again, the kiss a mess of teeth and desperation. He reaches up, breaks their kiss for barely a moment while he tugs Harry’s shirt off, then tosses it away.

It’s fast and easy when Harry follows and pulls the sheer shirt off of Louis’ body. It’s slow and easy from there, the way they can just kiss lazily, yet Louis’ hard cock doesn’t flag from where it’s trapped in his jeans. Harry’s taken to grinding in slow, sensual circles, dicks rubbing against each other.

It’s not long before Louis gets even more desperate and undoes the button on his jeans. Harry gets the hint at that – then moves off and starts to peel the skin-tight material away from Louis’ legs. It makes a little laugh bubble out of Louis’ mouth when he can see that Harry’s struggling to get it off – having known that the jeans were very tight.

He kicks them the rest of the way off, Harry laughing a little bit too, before they’re finally gone and crumpled up on the floor. As soon as the both of them are completely naked, it’s easy for their hands to roam, for each of them to kiss and share lazy touches.

“Wait, wait,” Harry says, a little giggle coming from his mouth as he reaches down to the floor near the bed. Louis looks at him, a fond little smile on his face. Except he’s just a little stunned when he sees that Harry grabbed the cowboy hat he’d been wearing the night before. He places it on his head, completely naked other than the hat, with a smug little look on his face.

“Oh my god, put that away.”

“I don’t know, I’m pretty sure you mentioned something about riding –“ Louis snorts – the unattractive noise forcing it’s way out of his throat before he can stop it.

“You’re insufferable.” He doesn’t think he’s ever laughed like this during sex – during a moment he’s always thought was meant to be heated and intense and serious. Yet, Harry seems so confident, so sure and so easy going that even with the silliness, there isn’t a hiccup.

“I’m leaving it on.” Louis is laughing again, and Harry kisses him quiet. It feels more intimate than it should for the first time they’ve had sex – but it makes Louis’ chest feel tight. It makes him want to come back, makes him want to do this over and over.

He watches as Harry reaches over to the drawer beside the bed and grabs some lube and a condom that is there.

His fingers and big, long, and thick inside of him. Pressing and prodding in all of the right places, making stars flash behind his eyelids. His fingers move with purpose, opening him up quick, avoiding his prostate all while still making it feel incredible.

Harry fucks like he talks; slow, but powerful. Each thrust knocks the breath out of him, makes him claw into Harry’s shoulders as he’s overwhelmed with all the pleasure. He comes faster than he would like to admit, but Harry follows right after, and everything is alright.

They lay together, silence between them other than the huffs of exhausted breathes. Harry had cleaned the two of them up quickly after they finished, and then pulled Louis into a tight cuddle. It’s several minutes before he speaks again, but when he does, Louis can’t help but smile.

“Do you want to stay the night?”

“You sure you’re not sick of me yet?”

“Nah, not yet.”

“Good, cause I’m definitely too lazy to drive home.” Harry’s laugh is officially Louis’ new favorite thing.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading – and if you _really_ enjoyed this story and want to support your local fanfic author, you can  
> [](https://ko-fi.com/A237HRB)


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